It went on great for 3-4 months and she reverted and said she loved me too. I don't understand why i'm feeling this way ex after all the awful and horrible things he's done to me. We broke up almost a year ago, he treated me really bad and when I was in the relationship with him all I wanted to was to be free from him. I came home and got a job and grew up. (1) You suffer from Stockholm Syndrome: Stockholm Syndrome is a psychological condition when the victim is made to develop a crazy empathy for the … It makes me really sad to think about. But honestly, I can’t get him out of my mind. It hurts that she still talks to Y and shares everything with her. I introduced Y to my ex. I went into deep depression from 2017-2019(for various other reasons such as study load/hypochondria/extreme low self confidence-as I was bullied in 7/8th grade). When I found out about it, he chose to stay with the other woman and he … Make this guided journal your trusted friend during your journey to feeling whole again. It also hurts to think that when she went with X(Old close friend), she never apologized or conveyed/acknowledged to me. I don't know what to feel. I know that if I was with her, she’s wholeheartedly support me and we’d make it work.” — Jim, 32, 8. Even after the breakup, I had to see her daily and it killed me to think that she is with my best friend(i stopped talking to him too). I really miss that.” — Andy, 22, 5. Not been with my ex wife for about 2 and a half years. I was not in contact with either my Ex or Y(neighbour). But my feelings for her never went away. I miss being close to her and holding her hand. But she didn't know that I had failed my prelim exams and still didn't tell her. “Is it going to make me ‘That Guy’ if I say blow jobs? I introduced Y to my ex. It hurts to know that I am not that guy. I confessed that it was her and then I proceeded to ask her out. 25 Mistakes To Avoid When Trying to Get Your Ex Back, The Truth About Intimacy And HS, From Someone Who Has Had It For 23 Years, 17 Men Discuss What Makes Them Miss Their Ex After A Breakup, 11 Men On The Excruciatingly Honest Thing They Miss About Their Ex, 17 Men On What Gives Them Second Thoughts After A Breakup. I loved her. I said sorry to her, she said it was fine, but I know she didn't mean it(Also conveyed on Whatsapp). Sign up for the Thought Catalog Weekly and get the best stories from the week to your inbox every Friday. We interacted on daily basis and I fell for her. I WhatsApp'd her in March, but she didnt respond, we talked for 5-10 mins but nothing special. But, most parts of our conversation took place on text(SMS). Me and my ex grew distant again. Why am I still sad and missing my ex-husband, after breaking up 3 years ago. I feel like I am losing it. 5 Reasons You Still Miss Your Abusive Ex! Sometimes I think its infatuation/regret/loneliness. I miss that little bit of excitement about driving home and opening the door and feeling like everything was good.” — Mark, 30. I wonder what my life would be like if I married someone who was that adventurous.” — John, 35, 13. But even then, I didn't understand the intensity/severity of her mental/emotional turmoil. Missing your ex is about feeling sad that someone you love isn't around or isn't connected to you in the same way anymore. We were married 31 years? I cant seem to get him out of my mind. Learn more about working with Thought Catalog. No calling them after a … But at that time she was going through some personal problems(her father had died when she was 8 years old and she used to miss him, her friends used to ignore her), but I was not able to understand the intensity of her emotional problems. No one is there to take care of me and I just feel like a loser in a pile of kleenex, miserable and alone.” — Sam, 29, 14. Like most of you who are currently overwhelmed with emotion and want to get back with your ex boyfriend, she was giving her ex absolute power over her emotions and well-being. I miss making dinner with someone. My mother is terminally ill and my ex was close with her. My ex and I have been broken up for a year and 4 months. I can’t see why this relationship would go on so long, if it wasn’t something real. Tracey Cox explains why many women can't get over their former partners I dated one girl in particular who always wanted to be touching when we were together, just little caresses to show her love. Don’t think that you miss him because you should be with him. But when I’m sick — that’s when I feel like I’ve made a mistake. As soon as my exams got over, I thought I will communicate with her maturely. Ten reasons you’re still obsessed with your ex - but why getting back together could be an even bigger mistake. “I miss my ex because she was a cheerleader for my lifestyle. Many times I hear patients say, “I know he was a jerk and I’m better off without him, but I still miss him and want to see him. Dedicated to your stories and ideas. Im thinking about messaging her Friends, (our situations are strikingly similar) to see if it would be a good idea to send her a message but I just dont know yet. I was devastated. If so, you need to shed this illusion before you can move on. Your Heart Will Heal—A Gentle Guided Journal For Getting Over Anyone, by Chrissy Stockton, will help you uncover inner peace and the strength to move on. “I was recently broken up with by a girl I loved. Feels like it happened yesterday. But she still was with X. I asked her why we broke up & what she thought about whose fault it was. I miss her.” — Aaron, 39, 2. So for us, dance with the goddess or God and they’ll let the perfect woman cut in. Why am I still missing my ex? I got to know that one of my closest friend(let's call him X) also liked her. This all was conveyed on Whatsapp. Voila. “My ex was that rare girl who wanted sex more than I did. “Sunday nights. We email some and text. 10-15 days later, we both had skipped school and started texting, when she asked me about the girl I liked. Is it because of loneliness? I get it, I can be crude and irreverent, but it’s who I am. She also did self-harm(I was not aware). I found myself thinking about a girl I met while I was traveling and who I traveled with for awhile. If you’ve been in love, you’ve been in this situation before. Reply Link. I met many girls but didnt feel for anyone as I had felt with her. I told Y to set me up with her. Here are the 5 most common explanations: 1. So everything. You actually go into a state of withdrawal when you come out a broken relationship. I miss having someone to text when something funny happens. It is going to be a long post. Regardless of what happened to derail your marriage, it can be hard to turn off all of the different emotions you still feel about your ex wife, especially after a long marriage. I know I come out as a bad guy, but it wasn't my intention, I was just fucking immature to understand any of this. I contacted Y. I told him everything I was feeling. When I’m watching TV alone I’ll think about how her head would be resting on my lap or on my shoulder. “I miss my ex because she was a cheerleader for my lifestyle. But I trusted Y being one of my closest friends at that time. I will add more to my story later, but I just left in August and have 2 kids. After lockdown, I saw her again, and ALL the feeling came rushing back to me. I miss seeing her face. I keep thinking she will ask me back. If I Broke Up With My Ex, Why Do I Still Miss Him? She was raised by hippie parents and kind of hated money. I know my mom is disappointed she won’t see me married when she dies.” — Peter, 20 . And when you’re strong in your relationship with people, they will definitely deepen your relationship with God because God is genuine love. You still romanticize them and are holding on to false hope: Is a part of you still clinging on to the hope that they will see the error of their ways, grovel at your feet, and then give you the relationship of your dreams? Once I even confessed that I liked another girl but never made a move on her. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. I started regretting that it was because of me that we broke up. “I miss having a reason to get out of the house. Allowing yourself to treat yourself kindly can really help getting over that sad, missing feeling. I am trying to look it up but all I can find, women are missing their exes. And since not everything with him … I will never be able to love someone as much as I did. I fell into depression again. I miss him so much and think of him every single day. “I broke it off with the last girl because I could tell she was wanting things to get serious and I didn’t. “Help, Brad! I told Y everything about my relationship with my ex. She started talking to me again. Recently I went on a business trip to a place a little more exotic than I’ve been in years. They started talking to each other. That's when I started to like one of them(13 years old). Then came lockdown but we didnt talk. I didn't even like my ex but I still wanted to take it. I still love him with everything I have. But I didn't communicate this to her as I was ashamed of my failure in the exam. I was under the impression that she would wait for me until my exams are over. I was pursuing Chartered Accountancy course(One of the hardest course in India) and again drowned myself in studying for 4 years. It’s been three years and two relationships later, and I still miss her when I’m horny.” — Mark, 33, 4. I told him I am through with him and his cheating ways. My story starts 8 years back when I was 16 years old(Male) and had a great social group in my colony (where I lived). But Sunday nights, man. There are sound psychological reasons why you miss your ex-partner. (She was still with X). “I miss coming home to her. Was coming out of depression gradually. I miss someone genuinely caring about how my day was. But this time with the thought that I will never be with again even though I loved her so much and she didnt reciprocate. “I miss the way she fit in my arms. We used to meet in the Basement/terrace and hugged/kissed each other every day. All the time.” — Mike, 23, 15. My life went on and thought that I was over her, I had to see her every day and had small talk with her. Submit your writing to be published on Thought Catalog. Wailing, the miss-my-ex-boyfriend-cry! I had no intention of ignoring her, but I just didn't understand her problems well enough. 10. I still deep down care for my ex and can't get over her. I keep thinking of all the good times we did have and wanting them back. I used to tease her and said that I like a girl and will probably ask her out any day. At that time 2 girls who were my neighbours joined our social group and played badminton/soccer with us. I moved out in July 2015, just few months ago and every day was a celebration of life for me without my ex. I read a very beautiful meme on Facebook a couple years ago, dance with God and he’ll let the perfect man cut in. Y confessed that he has feelings for her too. But somehow you need to find a way to move on. After joining just yesterday, I am reading my same story. I’m still happier with her, but it feels like there’s a little piece missing.” — Justin, 25, 12. I hate feeling like I am a prisoner to my emotions. 2016/2017/2018/2019 - We talked every 6 months but I was busy with my life and so didnt bothered her. What’s really interesting though is our relationship with a perfect partner can be much more genuine than with God, because with God we are always trying to get blessings but with a partner we want to give. She kept telling me: “Adrian I miss my ex boyfriend so much, please help me get back together as this breakup is destroying me and I am so unhappy”. I started studying hard for my board exams, eventually, I talked to her less and less. Our relationship continued, but there was a communication gap. A month later, I got to know she is with X guy(read para1-the guy who asked her out before me). I’ll crack a joke with my current girlfriend and sometimes she’ll look at me like I just kicked her dog. They started talking to each other. It’s your emotions, it’s the memories, it’s everything rolled up together. I told Y everything about my relationship with my ex. Had I not shown such immaturity I would still be with her. But I still miss her to this day. I regret that i didnt communicate about what i was feeling and told her sorry for what I did as soon as we broke up. “I make really good money at a professional job I have a degree in. At first, she resisted(Conservative family), but she said yes. I have dreams that we are a family again. Process every stage of your breakup: shock, denial, grief, sadness, insecurity, and anger while feeling supported and loved through your pain. It sounds like she’s your twin flame. We started meeting daily to just sit together quietly holding each other's hand. Im missing my Ex girlfriend from a few years back out of nowhere. Is it love? But she still was with X. I asked her why we broke up & what she thought about whose fault it was. I started crying every night. Missing an ex, he says, doesn't necessarily mean you're not ready to start dating again after a breakup. She still was going through emotional problems and once she showed me cuts on her palms, which she did intentionally(self-harm). I am going through the SAME exact thing. “I miss her when I’m with my family. “When I just got out of college I spent time traveling the world with barely any money. I thought I wanted freedom, and I do 6 days a week. Now might be a good time to start dating yourself, as if we’re. After all this, she talked to me even though some days I ignored her. The doctor prescribed me antidepressants, but still, to this day no one knows that I was bullied for 2 years(which I think caused me extreme low self-confidence/hypochondria). If I can also say, it sounds like you have an Indian over adherence to Dharma, but Sadhguru Jaggi Vasudev Said the greatest Puja is the truthful with yourself. We were in love. I was over the clouds and started taking her for granted. Don't know what to feel. I'm going crazy thinking about him. By subscribing, you agree to the terms of our Privacy Statement. I told Y, to ask her about me, whether she misses me or not. I Miss My Ex So Much!” There’s really two possible ways you can stop missing your ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend and stop feeling so lonely and heartbroken all the time: either you can get over your ex and move on, or you can get back together with them. None of us gets married thinking we will get divorced. And then I’ll think about how she would be complaining about watching baseball and I immediately stop missing her.” — Ben, 27, 16. francia September 18, 2018, 2:13 pm. I swear it was all she thought about. Spending time with other happy couples will make you feel miserable, which in turn will make you miss your ex-boyfriend, even if he was a complete and total jerk. I think girls hug and touch their friends and family pretty frequently, but for a single guy — I can go weeks without another human touching me in any kind of affectionate way. I’m a better person when I have a girlfriend.” — Stephen, 29, 17. Even if you’re missing your ex girlfriend, you have to remember to take care of yourself. Myth #2: If your ex was a jerk, you won’t miss him. “We’re recently broken up, so what I miss probably has more to do with missing a relationship in general than missing her specifically. Chrissy is the author of What I Didn't Post On Instagram and a poetry book, We Are All Just A Collection of Cords. She told me she didn't love me but liked me. I don't understand why I am not able to get over her even after all these years. You Start To Really Miss Him When You See Other Couples. What does missing your ex mean? This is a subreddit dedicated to promoting discussion about the philosophy of love and relationships! Left to my own devices, I’m a total hermit slob. She has moved on and got a house and a new bf. Why Am I still in love and missing my abusive ex? So I started talking to her again, and listened to her and provided her support as and when needed(Very selfish of me). You may unsubscribe at any time. Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. Like you said there is so much that was left unspoken. I am happy, but find myself constantly thinking, dreaming and wishing my ex was around. You might even want him back. Learn about us. After being married 31 years, I found out my husband was cheating on me. “I’ve dated other people since this one ex, but she is the only woman I’ve known who truly shared my sense of humor. I know my mom is disappointed she won’t see me married when she dies.” — Peter, 20, 10. Why Do I Miss My Ex-Wife So Much? TL;dr - My Ex broke up with me 7 years ago, because of my mistake. Things were usually good in the beginning. A year after his breakup, one young man explained to me that he would imagine his ex being proud of him when he accomplished a difficult task. It's normal and okay to miss your ex, and it doesn't say anything bad about you. I cry every single night. Sometimes I think I love her. How is it that in one moment I want to rip him apart, then in almost an instant I start missing him in the most terrible way. How to stop missing your ex-boyfriend for good. I have to see her weekly/daily basis as she lives in my society/colony. So, you broke up with your ex and now are missing him like crazy. I get it. The site may not work properly if you don't, If you do not update your browser, we suggest you visit, Press J to jump to the feed. But, according to professional dream analyst and author Lauri Quinn Loewenberg, “Whatever’s going on in the dream is going to reflect not necessarily [what’s going on] between you and your ex, but what’s going on with you.”Read along as Loewenberg explains possible meanings behind various dreams about an ex, and how they might … She still is the most charming/beautiful girl I have ever met. Using my throwaway account for obvious reasons. That’s just the way it goes. It doesn't mean anything other than the fact that you miss something and someone that was important to you and had a meaningful impact on your life. This guided journal will help you move on. It crushed me again. Treat yourself kindly, go out to the movies, order in. But sometimes I think about my dream and I miss the girl I dated right before her. But then I got to know that, she also talked to X(read para1) on a weekly basis. Why do I still miss him so? Sometimes she used to tell me her problems but I used to belittle/not understand exactly what she was going through. But I wish I could give it up and teach English to underprivileged kids. Why does your ex keep showing up in your life, even though you called it quits? This … I barely get to see my kids and miss them so much. If you notice that your ex boyfriend or girlfriend is still wearing something that you gave them as a gift, they probably find themselves missing you. I go … She’d come to the gym with me, do meal prep with me, generally be on the same page about fitness stuff. After 2 months she broke up with X. Y started talking to her more. My current lady hates that I wake her up to go to the gym and complains about eating non-shitty food. I wouldn’t trade her for anything, but I miss the way my ex understood me in that way.” — Jason, 28, 6. I know you can’t help it. I’m in my sweatpants Friday evening to Monday morning. I couldn’t do that to my wife, we want to have kids and we don’t want to do it on a teacher’s salary. “I miss her when I’m with my family. She told me that I was not with her when she needed me the most, and it was my fault that we broke up. I was in 12th grade at the time and I failed one of my prelim exam 6-8 months before my board exams(equivalent to US SATs). I told Y to set me up with her. Your support group of best friends tell you to steer clear of contact with them. My ex really knew what she was doing.” — Jonathan, 24, 7. The same sweatpants. I know know how you feel. I like my space, I like being a bachelor. Well, you are suppose to, but it sure isn’t easy because the pull your ex may have on you is both emotional and it has a chemical origin as well. She started talking to me again. I’ll get over her, but those things are hard.” — Kevin, 27, 3. I see him now and then. Voila. It’s pretty normal and you can use this to your advantage after a successful No Contact. Why I still miss my Ex Narcissist. Am I only the one who does not miss my ex husband of 14 years? I regret waiting for so many years. When something threatens our connections, primal feelings can fire up, and a break up can feel so devastating thanks to how we're wired both biologically and psychologically. I miss sleeping with someone. Before I could take any step, she broke up with me on the text. I told Y, to ask her about me, whether she misses me or not. I was married to a narcissist and I was his codependent supporter. She was always sending me dirty pictures while I was at work and basically up for doing it whenever I wanted. But I resisted. But at the back of my mind, I still had a feeling for her. 1. Then came a new neighbour, let's call him Y(Male). You may feel wrong and guilty when you miss or even think about a toxic ex, but here is why it's OK to still be slightly affected by a breakup even years after the fact. My parents also got to know that we were in a relationship, but they didn't pressurise me, but also didn't encourage me of my relationship with her. “I miss her at night when I’m falling asleep. At that point started having thoughts of him & her being together and made me extremely anxious again. Waking up from a dream about an ex can be jarring. I also studied harder for my exams and cut contact with her 1 month before my Final exams(didn't tell her the reasons). Whether it be a piece of jewelry, a shirt, or some other wearable item, finding your ex decked out in a former gift definitely means he or she still … But he said that it won't happen again and forget her, its been a long time. thanks for showing me how it is done but personally, i don’t think i can stop missing my ex because i am still in love with him. Give yourself … Breakups are one of the most traumatic things that can happen in our adult lives — but we still embark on new relationships, because the pay-off is worth it despite the risks. He miss me why. ... Oh my! I wish I had someone to put their arms around me and make me feel loved.” — Morgan, 29, 9. Is it infatuation(Extremely charming girl)? I would say when you feel weak in your relationship with your human people, rely on God and spiritual practice and Guru’s and knowledge to get you strong enough to face the storms. My mother is terminally ill and my ex was close with her. 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